The Last Boyfriend by J.S. CooperMy rating: 1 of 5 stars
I got taken yet again by a sexy cover and a clever title. I was a kind of anticipating the release of this book.
But around 10%....
Still, I figured I’d give it a good ol’ college try and by 30%
The first thing that got me was the dialogue. It was stilted at best and awkward/unbelievable/who-talks like-that at its worst.
“I was just coming to get some water.” I muttered, unable to stop myself from looking at his naked chest. Zane looked even more handsome and muscular than I had imagined, and I was slightly overwhelmed by the urge to run my hands across his chest. “I was feeling sexy— I mean, thirsty.” I quickly corrected myself, blushing furiously.
“I don’t see why you can’t have been feeling both ways.” He laughed
He looked even more handsome and muscular than I had imagined.
And how exactly do you mix up saying sexy and thirsty? Who the f*ck ever says they are feeling sexy out loud without coming out sounding like an ass?
The conversations between the characters were so freaking dull. A lot of their interactions should have gone on the cutting room floor.
“Hi.” I turned around slowly and tried to avoid his eyes as I smiled quickly. “I thought that was you.” He frowned, as he looked me up and down. “You look different.”
“Yeah. I’m in a dress.” I quipped. “And I have on makeup that hasn’t melted off yet.”
“And your hair is down.” He reached over and touched it. “It’s so soft and silky.”
“Thanks to Chi,” I joked, and cursed myself inwardly. He probably didn’t even know what Chi was. “I have naturally curly hair, so I use it to calm down the frizz and straighten it.” I explained to him, wanting to kick myself at how boring I was being.
“I see.” He nodded, looking as though he had no clue as to what I was talking about. “You should see it when it’s curly. It’s crazy.”
“Well I can’t tell.”
“I’m like the frizz monster.” I giggled nervously. Play it cool, Lucky. I took a deep breath and tried again. “You’re lucky. Your hair is always so straight and silky naturally.” I wanted to slap myself as soon as the words were out of my mouth. “I mean,….
Now I’m just being a nitpicking bitch here but they kept calling each other’s names during any given dialogue. As if the reader’s going to have trouble following their witty repartee. “What do you think, Lucky?” “I don’t know,Zane” “That doesn’t go there, Lucky.” “I know that, Zane.” (I’m just making that part up but not about the irritating name additions.)And it goes on and on and on…
Between the awkward dialogue, Lucky’s senseless internal monologue, and pedantic story line pacing, I am having a hard time finding anything to recommend this book except for a quick trip to the incinerator.
Writing: Needs some serious editing shears and better character development.
Characters: Lucky (the main female character) comes of ditzy and not in a cute way. Zane is just plain boring as hell.
Recommend: Holy Jeebus! Have you not been paying attention to my rant?
Apparently, I did.
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